Eyes wide open
Lately as I've been going about my day, taking care of my kids, my husband (he would probably fit into the kids category, but we won't tell him that! lol), working out, taking kids to school, basically doing the stuff of life; I realized something. I am so happy in my life right now. It feels so good to say that. For so long when I was at my heaviest weight, way before starting the weight watchers program, I was happy with my family life, don't get me wrong, but it was different. It felt as if I was going through life just existing. Just sort of floating by trying to hide behind the fat, the big clothes, trying to just sort of melt into the crowd as to not be noticed. I was so depressed at a time in my life when my brother passed away. I didn't want to do anything. I wanted to die right along with him. It hurt so bad to be without my mom who had passed away when I was nearly 11 years old, to have lost my brother when he was at such a young age. I always felt so homesick for my dad and other brother and my 2 sisters who were miles away. I just felt lost. Then something wonderful happened. My husband and I took our kids home on vacation to visit family. It had been such a long time since we had seen them all. It was so nice to be home again, to give my dad a great big hug and to tell him how much I missed him. To see my 2 sisters with their spouses and kids. To see familiar friends that I had once known. It was SO nice to be home again. I learned about my sisters success on the weight watchers program that she had lost 40 pounds. I also learned about my brother-in-law's success with the program that he had lost 60 pounds. I learned of my dad's neighbor and 2 of her daughters the mom had lost 60 pounds and each of the daughters had lost 20 pounds. I then remember being intrigued about this thing called Weight Watchers. I thought to myself "I can do this!" I learned more about the program, and with everything I learned about it I became more excited! It sounded so easy, it made sense. It didn't sound like a crazy diet that you hear about. Some of them are crazy and I wouldn't spend a dime on them, one that comes to mind is called "The Cookie Diet". How DUMB!!!! LOL That is how I got fat to begin with!! LOL
Anyways, we visited with my family and had such a fun time! My cheeks hurt probably the whole time we were there from laughing and having so much fun with my brother, my sisters, their spouses, my dad, my nieces and nephews. It was just such a blast!! Then came the time when we had to say goodbye. I hate goodbyes. I want to cry every time. It's just so hard to say goodbye to the people you love. We said goodbye and started our long drive home back to our home in Oregon. There was a day that I will call my re-birth! That day was March 12, 2008, the day I started the Weight Watchers program! It was so exciting! I finally had a plan to attack this horrible battle with my weight that I had had for so many years. I was EXCITED!!
When I saw that I had lost 3 pounds that very first week, I felt something that I hadn't felt in a very long time. I believed in myself again. I knew that I could do this. I knew that I was accomplishing something that I wanted to do so much. I, me, no one else, was doing this! I was so excited! I kept going, and going, and at times I would lose very little, and I mean little, like POINT 2 pounds! Talk about frustrating. But ya know what? I didn't give up. I kept with it. You know somethin'? All those "POINT 2's" add up in the end. After being on the weight watchers program for 2 1/2 years now, I am very happy to say that I have lost 42 pounds! I did it by myself. I tried my hardest, I didn't give up. I realized how much I wanted to be healthy again. I wanted to love myself again. I discovered that stubborn girl again that was me! (My dad doesn't like that I'm stubborn especially when I disagree with him, but it's all good. LOL)
Anyways, we visited with my family and had such a fun time! My cheeks hurt probably the whole time we were there from laughing and having so much fun with my brother, my sisters, their spouses, my dad, my nieces and nephews. It was just such a blast!! Then came the time when we had to say goodbye. I hate goodbyes. I want to cry every time. It's just so hard to say goodbye to the people you love. We said goodbye and started our long drive home back to our home in Oregon. There was a day that I will call my re-birth! That day was March 12, 2008, the day I started the Weight Watchers program! It was so exciting! I finally had a plan to attack this horrible battle with my weight that I had had for so many years. I was EXCITED!!
When I saw that I had lost 3 pounds that very first week, I felt something that I hadn't felt in a very long time. I believed in myself again. I knew that I could do this. I knew that I was accomplishing something that I wanted to do so much. I, me, no one else, was doing this! I was so excited! I kept going, and going, and at times I would lose very little, and I mean little, like POINT 2 pounds! Talk about frustrating. But ya know what? I didn't give up. I kept with it. You know somethin'? All those "POINT 2's" add up in the end. After being on the weight watchers program for 2 1/2 years now, I am very happy to say that I have lost 42 pounds! I did it by myself. I tried my hardest, I didn't give up. I realized how much I wanted to be healthy again. I wanted to love myself again. I discovered that stubborn girl again that was me! (My dad doesn't like that I'm stubborn especially when I disagree with him, but it's all good. LOL)
I've found that girl that once had the drive to get the job done. I found me again! I realized today that I am so happy with my life. I am no longer living in that fog, no longer existing in life, I'm no longer settling for what might happen. I'm making things happen. I am controlling my destiny. I am a better mommy to my beautiful children. I am a happier wife for my very handsome husband. I'm living my life with my eyes wide open!
Ya know what? That cookie just no longer has the yummy taste anymore. Life has a much better taste! And I want all I can get!!
You all see this very cute picture of me with my 2 beautiful sisters? I'm excited to go back home very soon again to see my family, and I can't wait to take another picture just like this one with my sisters again. We've all come a long way in each of our lives, and I'm proud of my sisters, my brother, my dad, and my 2 sister-in-law's for all that they have accomplished in their lives. I love them all so much! So, I will soon be adding a new updated sisters picture to my blog! I can't wait to show off my beautiful sisters and I and to show how far we all have come! Wait and see! We're all a work in progress!!!
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